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“Hypocrisy” and Government Largesse (A One-Act Play)

September 23rd, 2011 · 7 Comments

Scene: Friday evening, 9 p.m., a group of friends are gathered around a living room table for poker night.

Harry: OK, folks, snack time. I’m thinking we should order a couple pies from that new gourmet pizza place.

Darrell: What, Mama Solyndra’s? That place is so overpriced! Let’s just go with some chips and salsa from the corner store; I was planning to make myself a sandwich when I get home anyway.

Mary: Show of hands? [The group votes.] Bad luck this time, cheapskate, Mama Solyndra’s it is.

Barack: OK, everyone throw in, I’ll call for a couple extra-larges. Oh, and Harry brought the beer, so everyone chip in for that too.

Darrell: Hmph, alright, alright, lemme find my wallet.

Half an hour later, the food arrives.

Darrell: Let’s see, I guess the pesto and ricotta looks like the best…

Mary: Woah-ho-ho there Grabby McGrabberson! What do you think you’re reaching for there? As I recall, you didn’t think Mama Solyndra’s was worth it. You wanted us to tighten our belts and cut our snack spending. And now you want a slice? Guess that was all a lot of empty talk—what a hypocrite!

Darrell: Hey, I still think we should go with chips next week, but I threw in like everyone else, so unless you feel like returning my $10…

Harry: What are you, a comedian? You know the rule. We all vote on what we’re getting, and everyone splits the check.

Mary You’ve got some serious chutzpah! Sitting there with a slice in your hand, and you’re still talking about how you want to gut our pizza budget? Well actions speak louder than words, Darrell: If you had any integrity, you’d drop that slice right now.

Barack: You are looking pretty hypocritical there, Darrell. I don’t know how you expect anyone to take you seriously when you start badmouthing Mama Solyndra’s next time.

Darell: What? You guys, I said I don’t think it’s worth it. I wouldn’t have bought any if we were getting single slices, but it’s not like you gave me a choice about paying in! Now I’m not even supposed to enjoy any of the food I got outvoted about paying for?

Mary: Not really; it just means that from now on, you have to shut up about how overpriced it is and start voting for Mama Solyndra’s.

Fade to black.

Tags: Economics · Horse Race Politics · Journalism & the Media


       

 

7 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Mike // Sep 24, 2011 at 11:02 am

    Ha! I’ve been thinking of writing the same thing myself for months. Do you know who came up with the analogy?

  • 2 CJ // Sep 24, 2011 at 11:26 am

    Except that’s not the “hypocrisy” argument everyone is making.

    The part you left out is that Darrell pouted until everyone “compromised” and chipped in to get chips and salsa too, (delivered by DEI DeliveryCo with a $30 tip), wouldn’t let anyone else eat any of it, grabbed a slice of pizza on top of that, and STILL has the audacity to complain how overpriced the other food is.

  • 3 Gil // Sep 26, 2011 at 1:36 pm

    I think I’m meme-challenged, these days.

    Could somebody post a link to an example of the type of hypocrisy charge being attacked/defended here?

  • 4 Glen // Sep 26, 2011 at 9:25 pm

    I wish the dialogue were exactly the same, except that everyone’s paying for their pizza with someone else’s credit card.

  • 5 Pat L // Sep 27, 2011 at 4:06 pm

    Careful. It depends on what claim was made about the pizza initially. If the claim is “too expensive” (short-term benefit not worth cost), then the analogy holds. If the claim is “causes cancer” (short-term benefit, long-term harm) or “contains deadly poison” (short-term harm), then reaching for the pizza becomes a lot more suspicious.

    Granted, I’m not up to speed on all the rhetoric that’s been deployed about alternative energy spending and/or government spending in general (not sure if the Solyndra reference was meant to be restrictive or not).

  • 6 Freddie // Sep 29, 2011 at 9:38 am

    “Except that’s not the “hypocrisy” argument everyone is making.

    The part you left out is that Darrell pouted until everyone “compromised” and chipped in to get chips and salsa too, (delivered by DEI DeliveryCo with a $30 tip), wouldn’t let anyone else eat any of it, grabbed a slice of pizza on top of that, and STILL has the audacity to complain how overpriced the other food is.”

    Right.

  • 7 Barry // Oct 21, 2011 at 9:03 am

    Gil // Sep 26, 2011 at 1:36 pm

    “I think I’m meme-challenged, these days.

    Could somebody post a link to an example of the type of hypocrisy charge being attacked/defended here?”

    Go to rightwingstrawmen.com, and hit on ‘glibertarian special’.

    Julian, this post is really, really bad. I don’t always agree with you, but I generally respect where you’re coming from and how you proceed.

    This is on the level of a ‘FORWARD THIS! LIBRULZ DRUL!’ e-mail.

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